Ideologie und Religion: Stuhlgang happens Liste

Standard
 
 
Close-to-complete Ideology and Religion Shit List
 
– Taosim: Shit happens.
– Confucianism: Confucius say, "Shit happens."
– Buddhism: If shit happens, it isn`t really shit.
– Zen Buddhism: Shit is, and is not.
– Zen Buddhism#2: What is the sound of shit happening?
– Hinduism: This shit has happened before.
– Islam: If shit happens, it is the will of Allah.
– Islam#2: If shit happens, kill the person responsible.
– Islam#3: If shit happens, blame Israel.
– Catholicism: If shit happens, you deserve it.
– Protestantism: Let shit happen to someone else.
– Presbyterian: This shit was bound to happen.
– Episcopalian: It`s not so bad if shit happens, as long as you
   serve the right wine with it.
– Methodist: It`s not so bad if shit happens, as long as you serve
   grape juice with it.
– Congregationalist: Shit that happens to one person is just as
   good as shit that happens to another.
– Unitarian: Shit that happens to one person is just as bad as
   shit that happens to another.
– Lutheran: If shit happens, don`t talk about it.
– Fundamentalism: If shit happens, you will go to hell, unless
   you are born again.
– Fundamentalism#2: If shit happens to a televangelist, it`s
   okay.
– Fundamentalism#3: Shit must be born again.
– Judaism: Why does this shit always happen to us?
– Calvinism: Shit happens because you don`t work.
– Seventh Day Adventism: No shit shall happen on Saturday.
– Creationism: God made all shit.
– Secular Humanism: Shit evolves.
– Christian Science: When shit happens, don`t call a doctor –
   pray!
– Christian Science#2: Shit happening is all in your mind.
– Unitarianism: Come let us reason together about this shit.
– Quakers: Let us not fight about this shit.
– Utopianism: This shit does not stink.
– Darwinism: This shit was once food.
– Capitalism: That`s MY shit.
– Communism: It`s everybody`s shit.
– Feminism: Men are shit.
– Chauvinism: We may be shit, but you can`t live without us…
– Commercialism: Let`s package this shit.
– Impressionism: From a distance, shit looks like a garden.
– Idolism: Let`s bronze this shit.
– Existentialism: Shit doesn`t happen; shit IS.
– Existentialism#2: What is shit, anyway?
– Stoicism: This shit is good for me.
– Hedonism: There is nothing like a good shit happening!
– Mormonism: God sent us this shit.
– Mormonism#2: This shit is going to happen again.
– Wiccan: An it harm none, let shit happen.
– Scientology: If shit happens, see "Dianetics", p. 157.
– Jehovah`s Witnesses: >Knock<>Knock<Shit happens.
– Jehovah`s Witnesses#2: May we have a moment of your
   time to show you some of our shit?
– Jehovah`s Witnesses#3: Shit has been prophesied and is
   imminent; only the rightous shall survive its happening.
– Moonies: Only really happy shit happens.
– Hare Krishna: Shit happens, rama, rama.
– Rastafarianism: Let`s smoke this shit!
– Zoroastrianism: Shit happens half on the time.
– Church of SubGenius: BoB shits.
– Practical: Deal with shit one day at a time.
– Agnostic: Shit might have happend; then again, maybe not.
– Agnostic#2: Did someone shit?
– Agnostic#3: What is this shit?
– Satanism: SNEPPAH TIHS.
– Atheism: What shit?
– Atheism#2: I can`t believe this shit!
– Nihilism: No shit.
 
And of course we must add…Alcoholics Anonymous: Shit happens-  one day at a time!
 

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